The Cotton Ball and Orange Juice Diet

June 26, 2013

News

Orange juice

According to Dr. Manny Alvirez, as well as Eddie Murphy’s 23-year-old daughter, Bria Murphy, models have a new dieting trick/technique. What is it? Eating cotton balls dipped in orange juice. Mmmmm! The very thought of it makes me want to go out and buy a box of cotton balls, some Florida orange juice and get on my way to a healthier, leaner me! How about you?

Before you rush out to buy the necessary ingredients to try this new dietary technique, consider the following.

According to Dr. Alvirez, the following potential side effects should be considered before anyone starts a cotton ball and orange juice diet:

  • Gagging
  • Aspiration pneumonia
  • Bronchitis
  • Bowel obstruction
  • Twisting of the intestines
  • Bowel necrosis
  • Acute abdominal pain

Sure, those things look bad on paper, but the upside? Well, there isn’t actually an upside. Anyone surprised to hear that? I certainly hope not.

Folks, be good to your bodies. Cotton is meant to be worn on your body, not stuffed down your throats and washed down with orange juice!

Stop the madness.

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